One night, I hooked up with this guy Steve. Let me start out by saying that Steve has a HUGE dick. As in, I need both of my hands to correctly portray its circumference. It's so huge, that it doesn't fit in my vagina. Unfortunately. My vagina is just too tight to accommodate that shit.
But anyway, Steve invited me back to his place for a second try at accommodation. It worked slightly better than the time before, when we were hooking up on the sink in Lola and Joanna's bathroom, but it was nowhere near pleasurable.
Afterward, I asked Steve where his bathroom was. Steve lived in the basement room of his apartment, and he had some roommates. He told me that it was up the stairs and to the right.
I went to gather a blanket around myself, but Steve said, "You don't need that. There's nobody home."
I shrugged and replied, "Better safe than sorry."
I held the blanket in place as I went up the stairs. As soon as I got to the top, the front door opened and about ten people came inside. I dashed into the bathroom, glad that I had listened to my instincts but also slightly embarrassed for wearing questionable attire.
Lesson learned: never walk naked in a guy's apartment, unless he lives alone and the door is locked.
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